Couple Intensives
Is Couple Intensive A Good Fit?
What To Expect
The Path To Healing
What, Not How
It's Not About Communication
In my book, It’s Not About Communication, I present the basic idea that the problems you are having are almost always not about communication. And if you think couples therapy should be about giving you tools to communicate better, you’re probably wrong.
People tend to follow communication rules when they’re doing well. But trying to follow the rules when you’re not doing well won’t make you do well. In fact, when a couple isn’t doing well, in the sense that they’re frequently in panic mode with each other, they find it impossible to follow the rules. By way of analogy, ever notice how Rafael Nadal and a lot of other professional tennis players grunt loudly whenever they hit the ball? Guess what: grunting when you hit the ball won’t make you play like Rafa.
common questions
You and your partner will meet with Dr. Chalmer for customized, extended sessions of up to two and a quarter hours each. Couple Intensives get priority scheduling, and since all sessions are by telehealth (using a HIPAA-compliant version of Zoom), you can attend from anywhere, even if the two of you are in two separate places.
Dr. Chalmer will guide the two of you, individually and together, in experiential and conversational practices designed to open your hearts, promote healing, handle conflicts more effectively, and help you find your path.
From 75 minutes to 135 minutes. You determine how long the session will be, in consultation with Dr. Chalmer.
Dr. Chalmer does not accept insurance for Couple Intensive sessions – they are offered on a self-pay basis only. If you want to use insurance, which requires designating one of you as the patient and assigning a mental health diagnosis, ask Dr. Chalmer about scheduling a 45-minute session, for which he does accept some insurances.
You and Dr. Chalmer determine together how often to schedule sessions. Some couples come weekly or every other week at first, and then transition to less frequent sessions. There’s no fixed pattern.
Dr. Chalmer is bound by confidentiality, and takes that responsibility very seriously. This means he does not communicate with anyone in a way that might identify you, without your explicit consent.
There are some legal exceptions to confidentiality: If Dr. Chalmer has reason to suspect child abuse, or abuse of a vulnerable adult, he is required to report that to the appropriate state agency. If Dr. Chalmer thought anyone he is working with might be a danger to self or others, he might have to break confidentiality to deal with an emergency situation. Of course, if you have any questions, contact Dr. Chalmer.
The fees for each Couple Intensive session are as follows:
135-minute session: $450
120-minute session: $400
105-minute session: $350
90-minute session: $300
75-minute session: $250
Couple Intensive sessions are reserved by pre-payment. Dr. Chalmer does not accept insurance for any part of these fees, and you may not submit your sessions for insurance reimbursement, because there won’t be an individual patient and diagnosis assigned. However, you may be able to use an HSA, FSA, or similar plan to reimburse yourself–consult your employer or financial advisor to see if that’s permissible.
There’s no way to know in advance how many sessions you’ll need. Some couples are able to make the changes they’re looking for in just a few sessions, and some require more.
Because of the extended time reserved for Couple Intensive sessions, no refund will be made for any cancellation within seven full days of the scheduled time of the session. No refund will be made for time not used if a session ends before its scheduled time.
Cancellation more than seven full days before the session allows a refund of fees already paid for the session, less the fees Paypal charges (they no longer refund their fees when a refund of a payment is issued), approximately 3%.
Before you schedule an appointment for a Couple Intensive, please see information about fees for Couple Intensives here. Dr. Chalmer does not accept any insurance for Couple Intensives; they are offered on a self-pay basis only. If you want to use insurance, contact Dr. Chalmer and ask to schedule a 45-minute session.
Once you’ve decided you’d like to schedule a Couple Intensive, please click on the button below to fill out a signup form. Dr. Chalmer will then contact you, and you’ll schedule the session together by email.
