“Conflicted” writes: I’m a 48-year-old man and my fiancée is 42. She has an 8-year-old son. I have two teenage sons who are with me about half the time. My fiancée and I have been together for two years, living together for six months, so this is our first Christmas living together. With the holidays […]
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My Boyfriend is Overwhelmed with Parenting. Is this a Deal-Breaker?
Traci writes: Greetings Dr. Chalmer, This morning, as I lay in bed, dreading the day (or weekend) ahead of me, I decided to google “help with a troubled relationship” and your YouTube channel came up. I made some coffee, grabbed a journal and pen and listened to all your videos and took some notes! Thank […]
After 40 Years of Marriage, Can We Get Past All the Hurt?
Belle writes: My husband and I have been married for 40 years. In the past 40 years we have been at odds with each other over many things that could have ripped us apart but we have kept trying. We hurt each other so much that now the wounds are getting deeper and not so […]
My Husband Lost His Job and We Had to Move. How Do I Stop Being Angry?
A418 writes: My husband and I have been through stressful life changes. He lost his job after 19 years and we had to move away for him to find work. I’m still having issues with being angry at him and he feels terrible about everything that’s happened How do we get past this? We both […]
My Husband Wants to Try Polyamory, and I’m Conflicted!
“Poly?” writes: I am in my 40s and my husband “Bob” is in his 50s. We’ve been married 17 years and things are kind of blah in our marriage. We went to a marriage counselor and it didn’t seem to help much. We don’t seem to be connecting much and our sex life is pretty […]
I’m Pregnant and Engaged, But Now I Have Doubts About Both
Terri writes: I’m a 26 year old woman in graduate school. I’ve been dating Tom for two years. He has a good job and makes a good living. I found out I’m pregnant and we’re both excited about having a baby. Here’s the problem. Tom proposed when he found out I was pregnant. I thought […]
Should I Take In My Grandson, and Lose My Fiance?
Debra writes: I recently became engaged to John. We’re both in our early 60s and were looking forward to some stable time together after having been married several times (me twice, John 3 times). My daughter, Joanna, a single mom, has an opioid addiction and is about to lose her son, Andrew, who is 3 […]
Where Should I Move For Retirement?
Beth writes: I am trying to figure out whether a retirement in either New England or Florida is materializing. One or the other would be excellent investments but I seem to have trouble deciding. I have been considering retiring in Europe but am not entirely sure I could adjust to living there. Any suggestions for […]
Why Don’t People Pay What They Owe?
Liz writes: Right now I am trying to figure out what to do about moving. I was promised a very large sum of money for contract work that I have successfully finished. I have demanded payment but even though this was for a well publicized request for extensive and sometimes dangerous research, I still haven’t […]
How Do I Find A Partner?
Marty writes: Dear Dr. Chalmer, I have just watched your videos about sex, good sex and sacred sex. I really learned so much from these two videos and it was very informative as well as interesting and provocative. It made me ask myself questions such as how do I go from sex to good sex […]
My Fiancee Freaked When I Asked Her to Watch Porn With Me
Troy writes: I’ve been dating ‘Lois’ for three years. We’re both in our late 50s and neither of us has children who live at home. Once in a while I like to watch porn (the pretty mild stuff) and I’ve asked Lois if she would like to watch some with me. She freaked out and […]
Should We Move In Together?
Linda Z writes: Another issue just came to mind about relationships and shared space. Suppose I am moving to a house where a deposit is needed and then the purchase closes at the end of July, and he has agreed to see that the funds get to the closing. I am willing to purchase it […]