We’ve been getting some great reviews of Dr. Chalmer’s book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back. Here are some excerpts:
“This book is concise at only 158 pages, but it is so well written that it feels like we are sitting in his office or laying on his couch, talking about what we want and asking how we can get there. He shows us how to lay a foundation for intimacy and trust that will connect us to our partner for years to come. He also makes us take a look at all the reasons we should and shouldn’t get married. And if you’re already embroiled with a cheater? Well, he shows us how to navigate that situation too, and decide whether or not a fractured relationship is worth salvaging or whether we should simply walk away.”(Full review)
I enjoyed reading and learned more from this book than I expected to. The format and structure of the book makes it easy to pick up and put down. Some chapters evoke reflection and discussion introducing aspects of a relationship that are rarely examined….
This book will make a great Book Club Book pick, many discussion points and relatable at any age and years married. Definitely a recommended read!(Full review)
One of the author’s more intriguing insights in this book is the way that intimacy and stability are often in tension with each other, and that the lack of one tends to endanger the other in a relationship. Where intimacy is high and stability is low, the lack of stability makes it hard to stay together, or want to, no matter how good the sex is. Likewise, the presence of stability and not intimacy in a marriage relationship may encourage one or both of the partners to stray, with disastrous consequences on the stability of the relationship when that betrayal is processed. Interestingly enough, the composite pictures of the various couples in therapy rings true as they are definitely types I am familiar with as well, and it is all too easy to recognize the trouble that people have in dealing with the betrayal involved in relationships and the way that can often lead to breaking up, especially when the betrayal is reciprocated by the other partner. This book is full of wise advice that may either help encourage people to change their behaviors without therapy, or help them into counseling that might help them to break some bad habits before it’s too late.(Full review)
Super nerdy. Dr. Chalmer is a psychologist working with couples and he takes his 30+ years of experience and puts the big thing he’s learned into a short, easily digestible but still VERY FULL and practical book. Give me a book with case studies and the practical nature behind the issues and I’m in. Sold. The writing was easy and conversational, yet absolutely conveyed his thoughts and authority on the subject matter. It was really an enjoyable read….
I was hooked on this book from the very first sample I read of it.
I appreciated that [Dr. Chalmer] doesn’t shy away from difficult topics like sex, trauma, and anxiety in relationships and that he acknowledges the difficulties those situations present in maintaining relationships. I’ve even recommended this book to someone for precisely that reason….
I really appreciated this book and am even implementing a few things into my own marriage.
I give Reigniting the Spark five stars.(Full review)
The topic is relevant and Dr. Bruce Chalmer handles it with great expertise, making it easy for readers to understand and apply the advice, and encourages couples to seek help and heal from trauma. He looks at relationships from various angles and shares real-life stories so that readers will be able to connect with what he is trying to convey. He also speaks about the three kinds of faith that will help couples act with confidence, resilience, and purpose. The three steps to forgiveness are all helpful when it comes to working towards improving relationships and recognizing the joys of stability and intimacy in their lives. Reigniting the Spark can be re-read whenever there is a need to improve on relationships.(Full review)
Reigniting the Spark is a wonderful exploration for any couple wanting to move out of stress and into trust, or from having a good relationship into having a great relationship. This book is for you if you want to create deeper connections with your partner while identifying what is getting in the way of joy and intimacy.(Full review)
Whatever the state of one’s relationship, they can benefit from this entertaining, episodic discussion. Dr. Chalmer’s emphasis on kindness and lack of pop psychology draw the reader in as if they were reading a novel.(Full review)